August 27, 2008

What is shi-shi-toi?

Like the mark in Part 2 of the story about The Meeting, Part 3 contained a phrase that raised questions from some readers as well. He leaned in close, smiled at her and kissed her ear, then whisperspoke, "Now, baby, shi-shi-toi." So, what is this shi-shi-toi? It is a made up word, one not used in everyday speech that is used as a trigger, "a nonsensical word composed of bits of other words, or a foreign word, or a word pronounced backwards." This command or trigger word is the only way a girl trained in orgasm control or orgasm on command is permitted release.

Orgasm on command does not happen over night. It's the end result of a process that first makes orgasm much easier to achieve. It takes practice, with the right teacher, to make the kind of mental connection that is necessary. And there's one subtle, yet vitally important, aspect of orgasm control and/or delayed orgasm (delayed orgasm is substantially different than orgasm denial) that makes achieving orgasms easier and orgasm on command possible. The essence of orgasm on command is training such that the focus is shifted from HAVING an orgasm, and the anxiety that ensues, to NOT having an orgasm. That's a substantial and essential part of orgasm control and/or delayed orgasm as well as an underlying foundation for orgasm on command. The "fear" of not being able to orgasm is replaced by "fear" that you will orgasm without permission.

More about this concept and training can be found at Orgasm On Command - Not Just for BDSMers! There are links below the video that discuss the topic in much greater detail.

The essence of the information used here came from the first article - Orgasm Control - Nice explanatory/how-to article


  1. Fascinating. I kinda figured that's what the word was.

    Amazing the new concepts I can learn. I'd like to read more. What spoke to me most was the replacement of fear. So much for me (and I think other women) of achieving orgasm is letting one's mind truly go and allowing your body just feel everything,potentially with mind engaged solely in relishing the sensations. To be 'trained' to achieve that state more readily would be a wonderful.

  2. This is when "both" partners are so in tune with one another..

    It can me


  3. ah... the secret is out. very interesting. wish i'd know this a couple of months ago, i could have passed it on to the philosopher...

    too late now. but good to know nevertheless. many thanks.

  4. I just cannot wrap my mind around this concept; while I don't dispute that some people seem to believe in it - I just can't. I feel if this was a true possibility then there would be all sorts of emperical evidence and studies on it - but almost without exception, any "evidence" I have heard is self-proclaimed by the individuals in question. Does it happen? I belive life is full of surprises so I will give it the benefit of the doubt; but the bottom line for me it is another myth! If it works for you, then terrific - one must assume that as I cannot even begin to believe it is a possibility would in itself preclude it ever being a possibility in my life LOL

  5. "The essence of orgasm on command is training such that the focus is shifted from HAVING an orgasm, and the anxiety that ensues, to NOT having an orgasm."

    This is a brilliant concept as I find it very stressful to "try" and have an orgasm, so stressful, in fact, that I often cannot.

    Thanks for the info and great link!

  6. I've been able to do this, but only with my former Master. I didn't even realize what he'd been doing until he was back home in Florida and called... and *someone* made a mess on my kitchen floor :) Pavlov was a genius, but I think it's important that the dog doesn't know it's being trained.

  7. Yet another item to add to my wish list...

    Thank you for the linked info - and for adding me to your site ;)

  8. So I lied...I couldn't turn it off.

    You are absolutely right about not takes practice and is a damn fine ridge to ride when the release is screaming at you.

    By the way...can a sub get in touch with her dom side? How?

  9. Thank you all for your comments. I see a mix of those who have experienced this represented in here. I have certrainly read a number of accounts of girls who have been trained to one degree or another; either to cum on command with a keyword or through some countdown process.

    The concept of delayed or deferred orgasm certainly has it's appeal. The idea of striving to not release rather than the anxiety to do so when it is not happening can be an interesting technique to try.

  10. The switching of emphasis from "trying to" to "trying not to" also strikes me as one that is rather liberating for the sub as well as an enforcement of ownership.

  11. Interesting post, I had wondered about those women who are able to deny themselves the orgasm they so desperately crave until their master gives them permission.

    I don't know if I would be able to do this, perhaps this is a concept my sweetheart would enjoy trying out on me.